Are You Thinking Win/Win?

In today's competitive business environment, it is easy to lose sight of one critically important principle. Each and every encounter and transaction must create a Win/Win situation -- for everyone.

Now, it may be easy to dismiss the notion by telling ourselves that we already do this. But, a closer look may reveal that we're just a little more one-sided than we care to admit. In his iconic book, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, Stephen R. Covey says: "Win/Win is not a technique; it's a total philosophy of human interaction." He goes on to say: "Win/Win is a frame of mind and heart that constantly seeks mutual benefit in all human interactions.... mutually beneficial, mutually satisfying." Is this true today?  It's quite possible our attitude and actions in the areas of comparison and competition suggest that it isn't.

Comparisons with others can sometimes define our self-worth in a particular organization, group, or situation. For instance, small business owners and entrepreneurs are increasingly turning to networking groups, both formal and informal, to build referrals and ultimately additional business. While there is no doubt this can be an effective strategy, there are some pitfalls-- none bigger than perceived comparative "injustices". The idea behind a referral group is to partner with a group of like-minded business people to mobilize "outside sales forces" that will sing the praises of our products and services and supply us with a steady stream of customers -- and revenue.

Sounds great. However, we often get too focused on the receiving and put a much smaller emphasis on the giving. We show up and tell our story hoping to dazzle others with our value proposition while paying little or no attention to the other members of the group. Worse yet, we begin to take a mental inventory of who gets what and immediately notice that we are not getting our share of the referrals. "It's not fair", we say. "So and so is getting all the referrals", we lament. "I'm not in the main clique", we decide.  As Tommy Smothers might have said: "Mom always liked you best." Now our self-worth is beginning to drop. We make a decision that we'll just quit this group. That'll fix 'em. As funny as it sounds, isn't there just a little truth here?

Knowing that we must come prepared to give long before we expect to receive helps balance the equation and moves us much closer to the mutually beneficial, mutually satisfying condition that Covey describes. In fact, Covey's 5th Habit may be the key here. Seek First to Understand, Then to be Understood. In other words, if you fully understand your partner's business, you will be in a better position to help and ultimately earn the right to have your value proposition better understood.

Competition tells us that everything is a game, and that winning is the objective. The idea that if someone else wins, then I must in turn lose seems to be prevalent in our business culture. However, cooperation over competition may produce the best result. Having an abundance mentality ushers in a spirit of cooperation and allows for the greater likelihood of a true win/win proposition. Knowing that everyone can and should win empowers us to find the best alternative.

Covey tells us that with courage and consideration we can master the true habit of thinking win/win. The question is; will you muster the courage to give consideration to others in all situations and truly -- Think Win/Win.