Managing Our Un-Expectations

The hardest thing about the unexpected is we never know when to expect it. Now that might sound a little bit funny, but is there a ring of truth here? We're often told to expect the unexpected, and we even create contingency plans with at least an educated guess at what could possibly happen -- and a proposed course of action. The problem is, the unexpected we're expecting may not, and from my experience, often does not happen. As a result, we can be thrown off a bit and be forced to alter our plans in terms of time and resources to address what is now the truly unexpected.

I think Julius Caesar was right. Who can really say that they are not at least somewhat thrown off by something they didn't see coming? These occurrences of course have varying degrees of severity and consequences ranging from minor inconveniences to heartbreaking catastrophes. More than likely, our experiences will slide up and down the scale a bit and will hopefully be more on the serious but not life-threatening side.

As business professionals, we definitely need to plan for the unexpected -- if not specifically, at least generally. To be successful in our business or in our career, we need to carefully plan out our goals and objectives, and the strategies or plans we intend to use to achieve them. We also need to make plans to most effectively manage our time, our talents, and our treasure -- or resources. The greater control we have over these important elements, the more likely we'll be successful in what we are undertaking. Could it be this issue or element of control that drives our discomfort in times of uncertainty? I believe it is for me.

By now you've probably guessed that the subject of this article, and the purpose in writing it, comes from my own personal experience -- and it does. In fact it is a series of recent experiences that brought the idea to mind. Now I won't go into all of the experiences and situations that have occurred, but rather I will use them to sort of highlight my own thoughts and processes in navigating through some of these recent experiences.

This brings us back to the issue of control. For me, I believe it is the biggest factor in dealing with the stress and strain of the unexpected. While I don't consider myself a control-freak, I am keenly aware of my need to be in the driver's seat or at least in close proximity of it should the need arise. Okay, maybe I am a control-freak. If I am not careful, this feeling of not being in control of the situation can take me down some roads I neither want or need to go down. It can produce moods, temperaments, and even words that are not only unhelpful, but can have the capacity to cause a greater harm -- and they have. Words are powerful, especially the ones we speak to ourselves.

I chose to be a coach based on the desire for continuous improvement -- starting with myself. I believe there is greatness inside all of us and that each of us was designed for a specific purpose. More to the point, I believe we are happiest and most influential to the world around us when we are operating in our true gift set. The journey of discovery does not happen overnight and there are many unexpected events and even detours along the road. No matter how we design it, a great deal of this journey must be taken alone, with nothing but our thoughts and our faith to guide us. It is in this solitary time of walking, and dealing with the unexpected that our words become most important. The quality of our self-talk can make all the difference between success and failure.

Remember, I am all about the control. Even though my greatest desire is to fix it and fix it now, I have to realize it isn't always possible. In the moment, the only thing I have control over is myself. I like the way Jack Canfield puts it in his book, The Success Principles. He says people have control over only three things in life: “the thoughts you think, the images you visualize, and the actions you take.” If this is true, and I suspect it is, it tells me that my thoughts and my library of images have a regulating effect on my words, positive or negative -- and if I want to operate from a positive platform I know what needs to change. As the old saying goes, "what's down in the well, comes up in the bucket." Our job is to work on controlling what's in the well.

I want to continue this discussion in an upcoming article and would like your thoughts and ideas on some of the practical steps you take in dealing with the unexpected. Please feel free to leave them here, or message me. I'd love to include some of them in the follow up.

Also published on LinkedIn

, December 6, 2016

About the Author: Terry Crouson is the Owner and Head Coach at Silver Coach Solutions, LLC and is currently doing business as The Growth Coach of West Metro Detroit. He is dedicated to helping business owners, executives, entrepreneurs, sales professionals, and self-employed professionals find their way by finding their why. He is a highly respected business coach, speaker, facilitator, and community builder. Terry is certified in the Strategic Mindset Process, and is also a DISC Certified Behavioral Consultant.

Nothing to fear but...

"I love the man that can smile in trouble, that can gather strength from distress, and grow brave by reflection. 'Tis the business of little minds to shrink, but he whose heart is firm, and whose conscience approves his conduct, will pursue his principles unto death." -- Thomas Paine

Fears: We all have them. We may not want to talk about them, and we may not want to admit it to ourselves or others -- but fear has a real presence in our lives. Of course some of the fears we have are justified and help warn us or protect us from impending danger. The trick is to carefully separate the healthy fears from the unhealthy. Let's define an unhealthy fear as something that is holding us back or in some way preventing us from achieving the goals and dreams we've set for ourselves. Collectively, these fears can form what appears to be an immovable mountain and force us to camp in the valley when our destiny lies on the other side. Over time, we may stop recognizing them as fears and start believing them to be fact.

Faulty assumptions, limited beliefs, past experiences and failures, and those precious sacred cows can cloud our thinking and produce uncertainty, anxiety, and to some degree or another -- fear. The question is; how do we react? Do we come from a place of strength or weakness -- fear or faith? Do we as Thomas Paine says, shrink in mind and heart, or gather strength from our distress?

There is a great scene in the movie, The Replacements in which a team of previously unsuccessful or marginalized football players have a new opportunity to play professional football -- a second chance. When the coach surfaces the subject of "fear", the obvious answers come in the form of spiders, bees, and bugs. That is until the team's leader uses the metaphor of quicksand and how easy it is to get stuck in it. "You're playing", he says. "You think everything is going fine -- and then one thing goes wrong -- and then another, and another. And you try to fight back, but the harder you fight the deeper you sink. Until you can't move, you can't breathe; 'cuz you are in over your head -- like quicksand." Like fear? Sound familiar?

How often have we played on the field of our business or occupation and had a similar experience? How about in our personal lives? In spite of our best efforts, we will have setbacks, failures, and maybe even a few crushing defeats. Fear takes over and suddenly we are shrinking in mind and heart as we feel ourselves sinking in the suffocating quicksand. We may lose our confidence in our decision-making. Worse yet, we may lose trust in ourselves and others. In order to avoid the pain, we stop moving in the direction of our dreams and begin to rationalize our behavior and even tell ourselves a new story. "Maybe climbing isn't for me", we think. "Maybe I'm meant to be a successful camper. Maybe, I'll just stay right here." So, we quit. We may not call it quitting, but a deep search of our heart and conscience reveals otherwise.

Facing down our fears is never easy; if it were, everyone would do it. But, if we're ever going to do or be anything of significance, we need to leave our comfort zones, face our fears, and systematically conquer them. With courage and resolve it can be done. So how do we do it?

1. Admit to our fears and identify each one.
2. Get clarity on exactly what we are afraid of and why.
3. Check the validity of that fear and see it for what it is -- an obstacle to be overcome.
4. Get a clear picture of who we are and what we are when this fear no longer has a grip on us. Use all five senses to bring this new picture into focus.
5. Take one small step in the direction of your fear, and then another, and another. Stay focused on your new picture and watch as it slowly comes to life with each small victory.
6. Celebrate your successes and mark the milestones of your journey over the mountain. Be humble and acknowledge those who have helped and inspired you along the path.
7. Share your story with others. Your journey is not merely about you. It is about the people, perhaps the many people, you will help guide and direct.

Fears: We all have them. The question now is: What will we do about them? Will we "gather strength from distress, and grow brave by reflection?" Or, will we shrink in our hearts and in our minds. The choice is ours. There is a price to pay for courage, but perhaps an even bigger price to pay for cowardice.

This article can also be found on LinkedIn.

About the Author: Terry Crouson is the Owner and Head Coach at Silver Coach Solutions, LLC and is currently doing business as The Growth Coach of West Metro Detroit. He is dedicated to helping business owners, executives, entrepreneurs, sales professionals, and self-employed professionals find their way by finding their why. He is a highly respected business coach, speaker, facilitator, and community builder. Terry is certified in the Strategic Mindset Process, and is also a DISC Certified Behavioral Consultant.

Gratitude: 9 Qualities That Spell It Out

Gratitude: The quality of being thankful; readiness to show appreciation for and to return kindness. -- Oxford Dictionaries

At this time of year, we tend to hear a lot about thankfulness, appreciation, and gratitude. Although, these attributes should be in practice on a daily and year-round basis, it is only natural for us to be more reflective in this Thanksgiving Week. So before we get head-long into the celebration, let's take a moment to reflect on nine qualities that help usher in the spirit and the practice of genuine gratitude.

1. Genuineness: It is hard to truly see gratitude working in our life and in the lives around us if we are not genuine in who we are, what we stand for, and who we stand with. Think of it as the real you; that person who is so easy to lose touch with, but who speaks in a soft voice to often call us back to who we are and hopefully to the unique person we are created to be. The uniqueness of who we are and what we can be is reason enough to be thankful. Are we expressing it?
2. Reflection: How much time do we spend in silent reflection? How often do we get quiet and still enough to step outside of our own thoughts and recognize the presence of others and the role they are playing in our lives. People and events are often part of a bigger picture. How will we ever recognize their real significance or express real appreciation if we don't step back and look at the entire canvas?
3. Awareness: We often hear the term "being in the moment". What does it really mean -- and why is it so difficult to practice? We live in a world of constant distractions. The emergence of social media and its integration into our smart phones has an inevitable pull on our thoughts and our attention span. We agree to go to meetings, classes, and workshops, and somehow cannot resist the temptation to look at our electronic pacifiers. It might be a client, it might be a prospect, it might be.... But, is it? Really? Somehow we think we'll miss something good when the best thing we can be doing is probably right in front of us. Being in the moment is to be aware of your surroundings and what is being said, and not said. What did you do before you had a smart phone? Did you survive and even thrive? It is hard to be thankful for what is right in front of us if we insist on being somewhere else.
4. Tactfulness: It's been said that if the only tool we have in our toolbox is a hammer, then everything, and maybe everyone, looks like a nail. Is pounding the "truth" into someone an effective relationship tool? There is an old story about a wager made between the sun and the wind to see who could make a traveler remove his coat. The wind took the first turn and blew hard and strong until finally he was completely exhausted. As the intensity of the storm and rage increased, it only caused the man to hold on to his coat tighter and tighter. Finally the sun took a turn and with increasing warmth he caused the man to gladly remove his coat. Appreciation will seldom come in response to a beating, but it can be the product of a gentler, more tactful approach.
5. Interest: How much do we know about the people in our circle of influence? How much do we want to know? Often, we are told that if we want to influence people we need to act interested. Why the act? Why can't we actually be interested? An overactive self-focus can blind us to the needs and attributes of others. When the world is all about us, it is difficult to see the uniqueness of others. When we attempt to employ tactics and tools we are spotted for what we really are -- a phony and a hypocrite. Ouch! Think about it for a moment. What type of person do you prefer to talk to -- the well-practiced conversationalist who says all the right things, or the person who may not be quite as smooth but has a genuine interest in you and what you think? Let's stop acting interested and let's be interested. You'll thank yourself -- and so will others.
6. Time: We can always make more money and more things, but we can never make more time. Regardless of the level of wealth we may enjoy, it will never buy us additional time. How we spend our time and who we spend it with is an important signal to what we deem most important. If you want to know what's important to someone, look at the appointments, engagements, or activities that are never missed. This is a time valuation, and people act accordingly. To truly appreciate others and have them in turn appreciate us, we have to invest some of our most precious commodity. Many a person has lain upon a deathbed and questioned the wisdom of where his or her time was spent. Why not show appreciation for our limited time, whatever it may be, by investing it in others. We'll be grateful and so will those in whom we've invested.
7. Understanding: We can't truly relate to someone and fully appreciate all that person has been through unless we have walked the proverbial mile in their shoes. Beyond our level of interest in people lies our capacity and desire to understand them. We are often so quick to want to be heard and to be understood that we tragically overlook the necessity of seeking understanding. Or, as Stephen Covey says, we need to seek to understand before we attempt to be understood. Understanding shows caring and caring is what people want to see in us before revealing their innermost thoughts. We're all thankful for those special friends. Isn't true friendship built on understanding? We know our closest friends, and they know us. Yet somehow, we love each other anyway. Take time to understand.
8. Differentiation: People of gratitude set themselves apart in their attitudes and actions. They appear different because they are different. Thankful people have a certain humility and approach-ability that draws others to them. Thankful people tend to be happier people who smile more often and in turn cause others to smile. Gratitude for the little things helps them to understand and accept the larger blessings that inevitably come their way. Let's not simply be content to act different. Let's resolve to be different and make that differentiation a part of our gratitude legacy.
9. Edification: Grateful people are more likely to lift up others and find the good in them -- and there is good in everyone. Because people who express gratitude are generally happier with themselves they are more likely to see the good in others and acknowledge that good through edification. Everyone likes to be recognized and appreciated for their positive qualities and contributions. Thankful people are comfortable with themselves and are not threatened by the success of others. They are natural encouragers are not afraid to show it. May we say all the good we can, wherever we can, and as often as we can.

How do you spell out gratitude in your own life and in the lives of others? Are you practicing any or all of the nine attributes mentioned here? What would be different if you did? Thank you for taking time to read this article. It is much appreciated.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Author's Note: A special thanks to OldQuotes.com for sharing my quote.

About the Author: Terry Crouson is most thankful to be the Owner and Head Coach at Silver Coach Solutions, LLC and is currently doing business as The Growth Coach of West Metro Detroit. He is dedicated to helping business owners, executives, entrepreneurs, sales professionals, and self-employed professionals find their way by finding their why. He is a highly respected business coach, speaker, facilitator, and community builder. Terry is certified in the Strategic Mindset Process, and is also a DISC Certified Behavioral Consultant.

Does Chance Come Before Change?

If this current election cycle taught us anything, it taught us people have strong opinions -- and those opinions drive a variety of human emotions such as, joy, sorrow, fear, courage, optimism, pessimism, and more. One of the central themes or questions that seems to be emerging is whether true change can take place, even more specifically whether the opportunity to change is warranted or deserved.

This is the question many people seem to be asking in terms of the president-elect, and at least one outlet of the mainstream media. Since the announcement confirming the results of the presidential election, a firestorm of opinion has been ignited on social media, particularly Facebook. Specifically, there are two questions that are emerging in one form or another. One side is asking: Why won't you give the president-elect, Donald Trump, a chance to prove he can be an effective president? While the other seems to be asking: Why should we give him a chance?

More recently The New York Times has issued an apology for its coverage of the presidential election and now wants, in the publisher's words, to "rededicate ourselves to the fundamental mission of Times journalism." The question the publisher seems to be asking is: Will you give us a chance to prove we can be fair and unbiased in our reporting? Based on the discussion running across social media, there is no clear consensus -- at least not yet.

So it seems that these two examples are pointing in the direction of the larger question and that is: Can change come before chance? Let's look at our own lives. One of the hardest things we can do is institute effective change in our habits, our thinking, and our actions. We often use the data we have stored in our experiences, opinions, and biases to ask ourselves the why should I or why wouldn't I question. If we calculate the risk based on the information we already have, we're probably going to make a predictable choice. While it seems to be safe, is it really in our best interest? Will we actually grow or become stagnant -- or worse yet, regress?

The unknown can be a scary place, but if we never step into it how will we ever develop the courage and the character we need to fuel our biggest and best accomplishments? How will the Times? How will the nation? In other words, how will we ever become the very best version of ourselves if don't pressure-test our system? The old adage says; ships are usually safe in the harbor, but that's not what ships are for. They can only fulfill their true mission and purpose if they face the uncertainty of the open sea. We can equip and extensively prepare ourselves -- and we should. But, at some point we need to take what we have out for a larger test. We need to take a chance to get the benefit of the greater change.

Does the president-elect, Donald Trump deserve a chance? Does the New York Times deserve a chance? Do you, in the successes and failures of your life, deserve a chance? That's up to you decide, but consider this: How will any of the above prove the ability to change if we don't provide the chance?

As always, your comments and opinions are welcome.

Also published on LinkedIn

Note: A special thanks to OldQuotes.com for adding the author's quote to its collection.

Preparation: The Magic Key to Professional Performance

"That looks easy." You've probably said that very thing after watching a true professional do what they do best. I know I have. Whether it's a professional baseball player, tennis player, musician, or golfer; there is something almost effortless about what they do and how they do it. However, if we try to run out and repeat the performance, we find any number of words crossing our mind and lips, but easy isn't usually one of them. Obviously, what we don't see is the countless hours of practice and preparation necessary to achieve mastery. Should we expect it to be any different in our own professional lives?

In his book, Outliers, Malcolm Gladwell talks about the 10,000 Hour Rule and defines 10,000 hours as the time it takes to gain mastery in any specific area. Although now somewhat debated as to its accuracy, it does underscore the importance of continuous and disciplined practice -- the kind most of your clients, prospects, and partners will never see, but from which they will reap a huge benefit. As business professionals, we are paid for our results and the best way I know to improve our results -- and our pay -- is through a commitment to diligent preparation and deliberate practice. So what does that look like?

To me, it looks a whole lot like Anthony (Tony) Coppola and his company, CC King Entertainment. If you watch Tony in action, you see a near flawless presentation and entertainment experience. The sound, the lighting, and the play list all seem to blend into one beautiful picture that is aptly completed by a packed dance floor and professionally framed by a smiling and confident Tony Coppola working the mixer, the microphone, and the crowd. And, because Tony has developed and continually perfects his system, known as "The CC King Way", you can expect the same professional presentation and performance from any one of his other carefully selected DJs.

It's the beauty of a system, but it didn't happen by accident. When I talked with Tony about the 10,000 Rule he was quick to point out that continuous practice is the important qualifier. "You can't just poke your business with a stick once in a while and gain success", says Tony. "You have to be focused and deliberate in your practice so you can be laser-focused on delivering the best performance possible," he added. So what are those deliberate areas? For the sake of brevity, we'll look at three that not only apply to Tony, but should be important to every growing professional.

Personal Preparation: Having a mindset of continuous improvement is what separates the merely good from the truly great. Tony is an avid reader and is continually looking for information that will help him grow as a person and a business owner. He takes advantage of his time on the road by listening to audiobooks, podcasts, and CDs. He compares notes with other successful entrepreneurs to find out what they're reading and listening to. I'm proud to say he just recently reached out to me for some book recommendations, and I was more than happy to oblige. Tony also understands the importance of physical fitness and is dedicated to a regular exercise and training table regimen.

People Preparation: The journey on the road to success is largely taken on our own. However, knowing the value of the people and the relationships we find along the way is critical to lasting success in any business. Tony is extremely appreciative of all of his clients, prospects, friends, and associates. He is generous with his time and resources and adds value to nearly everyone he meets. His humble spirit and his gentlemanly demeanor make him very approachable and easy to like. Since people tend to do business with people they know, like, and trust the chances of Tony being remembered and referred, are extremely favorable.

Professional Preparation: Successful entrepreneurs know it is critically important to invest in themselves, in their tools, and in their business. One look at Tony's professional sound and lighting equipment reveal that he is a great example of this fundamental truth. Top of the line software, computer systems, and of course sound systems are the trademark of Tony's business. He knows to deliver the best performance; he needs the best equipment he can find. He also knows the importance of marketing and advertising and spends a great deal of his time and resources learning to be more effective in this critical area. He seeks out and employs specific professionals to help grow his brand, his on and offline presence, and ultimately, his business. Like every other area of his business, he is committed to the continuous professional improvement that can't help but find its way to the bottom line.

Yes, the true business professional can make it all look very easy, but looks are deceiving. It is the preparation that makes the professional. Are you putting the time into yours?

Note: Tony Coppola is owner and founder of CC King Entertainment and is the "King" of Michigan Wedding Services. For more information visit: www.cckingent.com.

Originally published on LinkedIn, September 6, 2016

4 Ways to Catch a "Connector"

Of all the strategic partnerships and business alliances, there is one that is an absolute must have -- The Connector. Connectors are those special people who have a natural or learned affinity for building relationships and trust with just about everyone they meet. And, while we all fancy ourselves to be a connector at some level, there are those who are so good at it, they make it seem effortless.

No one does it better than my friend and client, Kathy Hoen of Community Alliance Credit Union. I recently sat down with Kathy to talk about what makes her so good at what she does. During our conversation we identified four specific traits that are part of her "connector's DNA". Look closely and see if you can catch the connectors in your circle of influence.

1. Connectors have a genuine interest in people and their individual story. While many people are fascinated by themselves, connectors are fascinated by others. They have a natural curiosity about everyone they meet -- and their demeanor is genuine and comforting. There is nothing phony or contrived in their approach, just a knack for asking the right questions. Upon learning what someone does, occupationally, I've often heard Kathy ask: "Wow, how did you get started doing that?" Or, she might say something like: "That is so interesting; tell me more about what you're doing and how you do it." Simple questions and statements that generate the open dialogue connectors need to find and collect those thin threads of information that are later woven into one or more mutually beneficial connections.   
2. Connectors are active listeners. When you're sitting with someone like Kathy, you know you have her full attention. Her eye contact, body language and rapt attention to what is being said lets you know she is actively listening. Her intention is to stay in the moment and treat the conversation as if it is the most important thing she'll do that day. That look of fascination with what is being said is comforting and goes a long way in building favorable and trusted relationships.
3. Connectors see the possibilities and know the value of facilitation. It is so easy to get caught up in our own needs, wants, and desires -- and in the process, lose track of valuable opportunities to connect others. Not so with connectors. A good connector sees the possibilities and clearly understands the principle of givers gain. Simply put, we are much more likely to get what we want if we first work to help others get what they want. Rather than simply providing a card or a number, good connectors, like Kathy, understand the possibility of helping two people in a single connection -- and will do all they can to facilitate a meeting or meaningful contact. Arranging such a meeting takes more time and effort, but it can be worth it. "Fostering the introduction helps make the connection real and increases the possibility of a good match", says Kathy. "It also lessens the likelihood of having the card or phone number being put aside and forgotten." 
4. Connectors take the responsibility -- and the credit for the connections they make. Effective partnerships are built on trust and accountability. A great connector understands the necessity of quality connections and solicits feedback from those involved. Building a solid track record is important to the connector's success as it increases the likelihood of being recommended to others and of being the provider of the product or service he or she represents. We know that people do business with people they know, like, and trust. Connectors, like Kathy can usually accomplish the first two simply by virtue of what they do. However, the pivotal point of trust must be earned and then carefully cultivated and maintained. Understanding the reasons for a failed or unsuccessful connection and openly celebrating the success of the effective connection builds trust, credibility and repetition.

So, who are the connectors in your inner circle? Are you catching them in the act of what they do best -- and netting the rewards for your customers, your clients, your partners, and yourself? Now is the season. Happy hunting! 

Note: Kathy Hoen is the Business Development Officer for Community Alliance Credit Union and is in the business of helping business owners, professionals, and individuals through a variety of services to meet their financial needs. For more information visit CACU online at: www.communityalliancecu.org.

Also published on LinkedIn Pulse, August 30, 2016

Speak for Yourself

Just as every picture tells a story, every story paints a picture. In the great gallery of business ownership, what does your picture look like? Is it vibrant, colorful, and interesting? Or, is it bland, abstract, or even haunting? If examined closely, does it bear the unmistakable markings of the original artist? Or, does it look more like a copy, a cheap imitation, or worse, a forgery? Perhaps the biggest question of all is: Why should anyone stop and take a look?

As business owners, we may not think of ourselves as artists, but in reality that is exactly what we are. We take a blank canvas and from a private world no one else has ever really seen, we draw the images and mix the colors. We design, create, shape, and mold an idea or a persistent dream into a viable, marketable, and hopefully profitable small business. We breathe life into it with all our heart, all our soul, and in most cases, every ounce of our physical, mental, and emotional energy. You get the picture. Does everyone else? Are you telling the story that paints the picture? Because, truth be told, no one tells it quite like -- you!

A great example of this truth is Kate McCarty of Embassy Title Agency. Kate's story is  one of success and inspiration, and there is no one who tells it better than Kate. Starting as a single mom with little more than a dream and the unwavering courage to pursue it, she has created so much more than a successful title agency. She has created a picture of hope, and a story of determination and persistence. It's a story that's making a difference in the lives of others every time she tells it. It's also a story that defines her business and brings intense color to the picture she's painted, not to mention the many lives that have been touched in the pursuit of home ownership and in the desire for gainful employment.

So, what's your story? How does it color the picture of your business and of you? I encourage you to take the time to craft it, and then make the time to tell it.

Note: Kate McCarty and Embassy Title Agency is the 2016 recipient of the Livonia Chamber of Commerce's 2016 Outstanding Small Business of the Year. 

Also published on LinkedIn Pulse, August 23, 2016

Business Owner: First Do No Harm

“I will follow that system of regimen which, according to my ability and judgment, I consider for the benefit of my patients, and abstain from whatever is deleterious and mischievous.” -- From The Hippocratic Oath

The connection between physicians and The Hippocratic Oath is well-known -- as is the often misattributed phrase, "first do no harm". Although this popular phrase is not actually found in the oath, it is certainly reflected in the excerpt above -- and there is an expectation that physicians and aspiring physicians will, to the best of their ability, faithfully follow its command. At least, this is what I sincerely hope each time I place myself in my doctor's care. As business owners, shouldn't those we do business with, or wish to do business with, expect the same level of commitment from us? 

Let's look at our excerpt from The Hippocratic Oath. If we remove the word, patients, and then substitute the words clients, customers, partners, prospects, etc., haven't we to at least some degree, verbalized a commitment that is very similar to our capable and committed physicians? While our actions or inactions may not be life-threatening, they are certainly important to those we come into contact with in the course of doing business. So then, shouldn't we, as business owners, make the basic and ongoing commitment to -- first do no harm? But, are we intentionally or even unintentionally being "deleterious" or "mischievous"?

I believe that in the course of developing, operating, and continually growing our small business we can certainly run the risk of having harmful or questionable thoughts and actions close in on us. We're under pressure to perform and to profit -- and if we're not careful, that pressure can cause us to lose focus and forget the unwavering commitments we've made to ourselves and others. And while there are several areas of risk, I believe there are at least three to which we want to pay particular attention. 

Do no harm to your customers: Clients have contracted our services or bought our products based on our expressed promise --  and we must meet or exceed their expectations, especially after the check has been cut. While it is tempting to focus on closing our next deal and collecting our next check, we do so at the risk of causing harm. The best way I know to avoid harm is to consistently increase value and intentionally deliver more than expected. 

Do no harm to your competitors: As business owners, we are expected to be competitive and position our businesses favorably in the marketplace. We want to stand out from our competitors but we must do so with integrity, truthfulness, and a sense of fair play. It is neither necessary, nor wise to "knock" the competition. While we don't have to extol their virtues and values, we should never allow ourselves to slander, malign, or speak negatively about our competition in order to create a more favorable view of ourselves. It simply doesn't work -- at least not with the type of client you probably want. When asked about my competition, I will usually respond by saying, "great company, great people" and leave it at that. My goal is to concentrate on the value of my own services with the intent of showing why my company is the best choice.

Do no harm to yourself: This may sound like a strange one, but it's extremely important in the course of building a successful business. On its best days, business ownership is challenging and requires our full attention. On its worst days, business ownership is overwhelming and stressful. Our dreams of freedom become nightmares and we may feel trapped and alone. If your name is on the building or the business plan, you know exactly what I'm talking about. For that reason, it is important that we commit ourselves to a model of continuous improvement and carefully guard our thoughts and our associations. What's down in the well really does come up in the bucket. Simply put, what dominates our thoughts, dominates our talk -- and the words we think and say can either be the building blocks of improvement or the stones we hurl toward our own destruction.

Our trusted physicians know from the moment they make their choice to enter into the medical profession, there is an expectation they will embrace the caring tenets of The Hippocratic Oath. As trusted business owners, should we expect any less from ourselves and our profession? Repeat after me:

“I will follow that system of regimen which, according to my ability and judgment, I consider for the benefit of my (insert business affiliation here), and abstain from whatever is deleterious and mischievous.”

Also published on LinkedIn Pulse, August 16, 2016

Personal Success: What's the Main Ingredient

We hear a whole lot about focus, prioritization, and smart planning -- and we should. It's not hard to see that the landscape of social media alone is one of clutter and distraction. Factor in the other areas of our lives and there is a huge need for focused attention on the vital few; the big rocks; the top three; etc. But what is the absolute most important priority of all? What is the one ingredient on which every other vital thought, task or action depends? It's YOU!

Now, this may seem very obvious and appear to be an oversimplification or maybe even total nonsense. Is it? Let me ask it this way: How many of the things on your "vital few list" would be completed without you? The answer is, none -- at least not by you. Are we then at some level taking for granted that somehow we will always be around to do the things we want and need to do -- for ourselves and most importantly for others?  

Are we neglecting the critical matter of our physical, mental, and spiritual health in favor of something far more "important"? Sounds silly doesn't it? Yet how many times have we heard people say they don't have time to plan meals, get regular exercise, read, play, and reflect?  How many times have we heard ourselves say it? Our intentions are good, but our well-being is not fueled and maintained by our good intentions. Sadly, time runs out on our someday resolutions and we are no longer able to make the change -- and least not in the manner we previously could. My own recent health issues have made this point very clear to me, and they are really the driving force behind this post.

Simply put, I've learned that we are our most important asset and we need to value and protect that asset to the absolute best of our own ability. So how do we get started? If you already have a to-do list or list of prioritized action items, this should be fairly easy. If you don't have such a list, it should be even easier. Just go to the top of the list and write down, or begin your new list with -- "ME". Under that make at least three bullet points: Physical, Mental, and Spiritual. Then write down some basic actions that you are willing to take to get started in each of these areas. It might look something like this:

• Physical: Start the day with a healthy breakfast and a 30 minute walk, run, or bike ride. (You can always add more as you get into the habit of regular exercise.) Plan your meals based on a healthy eating plan designed to fuel the body and help you reach and maintain a healthy weight.
• Mental: Set a specific time and place on your calendar for 15-20 minutes of reading, writing, or journaling. I believe daily reading is critical to the continuous improvement process, and can serve as a stimulus for blogging or journaling. I also use a STOP or Strategic Time Out Process in which I take 15 minutes each day, usually in the late afternoon, to think strategically about my business, my relationships, and my goals and objectives. It helps bring focus and renews my energy.
• Spiritual: Give yourself a daily time of deep reflection and meditation. For me, this is my specific prayer time and an opportunity to reflect and connect with God. This is also the place I seek strength for the physical and mental tasks of the day. 

All other priorities are then simply ranked behind this renewed commitment to yourself. However, don't be surprised if your new "me focused" activity changes much of what you previously regarded as "critically important" -- it certainly has for me. But then, that is really a subject for another day.

Let's make a commitment to take care of ourselves and to do it on a daily basis. Find at least one friend to share your commitments with, and then ask them to hold you accountable for the personal goals and results you've written down -- and by all means, do write them down. It gives tangibility and power to your commitment-- and that commitment is to yourself.

Originally posted on LinkedIn Pulse, July 19, 2016

SMART Summertime Goal Challenge: Are You In?

What's one goal you would like to accomplish between now and September 1, 2016? One of my business networking groups has launched a fun yet challenging initiative designed to help improve our goal setting process. 

Over the next 90 days, participating members will work toward the achievement of one goal. Could be big, could be small. Could be business, could be personal. Whatever it is, it must be a realistic, meaningful, and attainable goal. We'll be using the SMART process to write down, plan, and track our chosen goal and then reporting on our results in early September.

I'm thinking it would be interesting to do something similar with you, here on LinkedIn. Are you in? If you'd like to participate, drop me a note at tcrouson@thegrowthcoach.com, with the subject line: SMART Summertime Goal Challenge. I will then send you a SMART sheet to help you start the process. Let's make this fun, but let's also make this an opportunity to accomplish something of value.

A big thanks to Kathy Hoen  who originated the idea and is herself, quite an inspiration.

Remember, SMART Goals are: Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Relevant, and Time-Bound.

So, are you in? Looking forward to hearing from you.

Clutter: Are You a Major Contributor?

“Advertisements are now so numerous that they are very negligently perused, and it is therefore become necessary to gain attention by magnificence of promises, and by eloquence sometimes sublime and sometimes pathetic.” -- Samuel Johnson

The above quote, first written in 1759, gives us a clear indication that advertising or marketing "clutter" is not particularly new. However, some of the more modern day contributors and culprits may very well be. The rise of social media and its widespread availability has ushered in a new form of advertiser and marketer not seen or dealt with in the past. Who is it? It's you -- and it's me.

Going back to 2004, I can remember giving presentations stating the average consumer was being bombarded by more than 3,600 messages every day. While its accuracy can always be debated, I think we can agree it's a big number and it's only gotten bigger as the years have gone by.  But, I'm thinking the ever-increasing number of marketing messages may not be as significant to today's clutter factor as is the source of some of those messages -- you and me.

There is no doubt that technology has leveled the playing field for business owners, entrepreneurs, and self-employed professionals. With the help of the Internet and affordable software, it is now possible to run a multi-million dollar business out of our home with every bit of the sophistication, or at least the look, of yesterday's best brick and mortar businesses. The same technology has also given us access to social media channels and an individual reach potential that was not really accounted for in that modern era called 2004. In fact, Facebook was just launched that same year and would not become widely available until late 2006. 

So while advertising access was largely in the hands of the "professionals" and controlled through rather expensive media options, a new day was coming and with it a whole new breed of marketers, authors, publishers, gurus, and experts. In this new marriage of access and technology we were about to get our chance to do our own marketing, without editing, without review, and without restraint -- and we've been more than happy to make it happen -- for better and for worse.

In a January 2015 article, How to Break Through the Social Media Clutter, Travis Huff talks about the impact of social media and the necessity of effective marketing strategies and content. He says:

"Social media use is growing by leaps and bounds every day and popular networks like Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter are among some of the most crowded corners of the internet. Let’s look at some stats:

●     Social media spam rose 355 percent in the first half of 2013

●     Between 5 and 11 percent of Facebook accounts are fake

●     Twitter adds 11 new accounts per second every day

●     YouTube users upload 48 hours of new video of every minute of each day

With so much happening so quickly on social media networks, is it even possible for brands to stand out and get noticed?"

With these stats and information in mind, I go back to the Samuel Johnson quote and his seemingly prophetic observation that "it is therefore become necessary to gain attention by magnificence of promises, and by eloquence sometimes sublime and sometimes pathetic.” With great power does indeed come great responsibility. While we all want to freely market and brand ourselves, our products, and our services, it is my hope that we will do all in our power to be a whole lot more sublime and a whole lot less pathetic in our efforts. For most of us, seeking the help of a qualified, proven, and professional marketer or marketing company is probably a good idea and I highly recommend it.

Advertising clutter is nothing new and will of course always exist, whether in the hands of the professional marketer or in the hands of the entrepreneurial beginner. The level to which it affects the marketplace and our customers and our prospects is largely up to us and the responsibility we take in learning to be as effective as possible. May we be magnificent and may we be eloquent in all our marketing pursuits.

Your comments and observations are most welcome.

4 Ways Your Smile Can Add Face Value

"A warm smile is the universal language of kindness" -- William Arthur Ward

Nothing can communicate happiness, energy, or enthusiasm quite like a smile. When we look at all the tools or weapons in our human relationship arsenal, none may be as effective, or as overlooked, as this warm and genuine curve of expression. We may be putting great effort into choosing just the right words or in conjuring just the right phrases to let people know how much we care and even our intent to serve. But, are we doing it with a smile on our face?

In one of my networking groups, we have a dentist who opens every 60 second introduction or commercial with the words; "smile, friends." What gives his words power is the genuine smile he wears before, during, and after. For that reason, Dr. Daniel Lipnik is one of my favorite people. He's also considered to be quite an inspiration to others -- and it all begins with his deliberate decision to smile.

So, what are some of the additional benefits of smiling and how can such a simple act add face value to our relationships and to our success? Let's look at these four:

1.      Smiling relieves stress. A study conducted by psychological scientists Tara Kraft and Sarah Pressman of the University of Kansas, suggests that "holding a smile on one's face during periods of stress may help the heart." It seems that in this age of technology and 24/7 access, the number of stressors and stressful situations are increasing -- and it doesn't seem likely that will change in the future. Heart health is and should be a major concern for all of us. The good news is the study also suggests that we don't have to necessarily be happy to reap the smile benefit. So, the next time we're stuck in traffic or staring down a long line, let's put a smile on our face and just "grin and bear it."

2.     Smiling is a universal language. A warm smile knows no language barrier and translates in any culture. Author Denis Waitley says: "A smile is the light in your window that tells others that there is a caring, sharing person inside." While language, customs, and gestures may indicate something different from culture to culture, a genuine smile is always universally recognized and welcomed. 

3.     Smiles are contagious. Have you ever tried to hold a frown in the presence of an enthusiastic smile? It's really hard to do. I can remember watching the old TV show, Make Me Laugh. There were many times when the comedian induced smiles and laughter without ever saying a word. Sometimes just a knowing and maybe slightly devious smile was all it took. I'm sure most of us want to be viewed as a positive influence in whatever situation we happen to be in. If we can't be witty, charming, or engaging, at least we can be smiley -- and that smile might just be the "bug" that room needs.

4.     Smiles can inspire action. Since a genuine smile can communicate happiness and enthusiasm, it can also motivate us to do something about it. We know that smiling attracts others and lets them see that extra spring in our step. We then become an example and even a source of energy to those around us. In other words, our smile may be saying and doing more to inspire others than anything that is coming out of our mouth. At the very least, our smile helps us set the tone for what we want to communicate and empowers our words and our efforts to influence the people around us.

A smile doesn't cost us a thing and it is something we can improve and develop the more we use it. We can make use of our smile even when we're talking on the phone. Since the person on the other end of the conversation cannot see our expression and has only the sound of our voice to work with, it is important that we communicate with enthusiasm and a warm friendly tone. A smile does that very thing.

Radio announcers are trained to smile whenever they are speaking into the microphone. It helps build goodwill with listeners and gives them the feeling the announcer is speaking specifically to them. As a former announcer, I can attest to the value of the "radio smile", even though I remember thinking I looked like an idiot as I caught my reflection on the studio glass. Still, I continued to practice my smile anytime I was on the air, and even did so in my mirror at home. I suggest you do the same.

It may feel foolish to see yourself smiling like the Cheshire Cat, but is an exercise that can improve your health, your relationships, and the size of your bank account.  The thought of accomplishing just those three things should justify the extra effort and definitely make you -- Smile!

Mistakes, Missteps, & Misunderstandings

""By seeking and blundering, we learn." Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

While it is our best intention to do right and to be right, we often fall short. Imperfections and frailties are part of the human experience. We are imperfect people living in an imperfect world. We make imperfect decisions and take imperfect actions. And sometimes, we just get it wrong -- and no one is immune.

Like the proverbial elephant in the room, failing to recognize and acknowledge our own inevitable shortcomings, only prolongs the pain and can short-circuit our desired success due to damaged relationships, mistrust, and uncertainty. Also like the COPD commercial in which the elephant is sitting on the chest of some unfortunate soul, these things can crush the life out of us and destroy our confidence --  or at the very least, render us ineffective. Isn't it time to ask the elephant to leave?

As we know failure is part of the growth process. However, it is one thing to know and another to apply this knowledge to our own situation, or to that of someone close to us. It is hard and it takes courage, humility, and a whole lot of patience. While there are probably numerous categories in which our failures can be revealed, I want to take a look at what I believe to be the top three.

Mistakes: Sometimes we make the wrong decision. The path we chose can simply be the wrong path for us. Although usually based on the best information we have at the time, at some point it becomes apparent a serious mistake has been made. Often our mistake comes as a result of carelessness, sloppy thinking and poor research. However it occurs, there comes a time when we have to face it and fix it -- and the longer we delay, the heavier the consequences. Fixing a mistake may involve swallowing our pride and asking for help or even forgiveness. Until we are either dead or totally incapacitated, nothing is unfix-able, but it may take a bit of time and effort to remove the eraser marks.

Missteps: We may be on the right path, but we may be taking some wrong turns or finding detours and distractions along the way. In this case, there is nothing wrong with the decision, only the execution on the planned route. This is where a true PDCA process is needed. Plan it, do it, check the result, and then make the adjustment. Most of us are fairly good at the planning stage and we may even have a good amount of do in us. However, if we're not checking the result and then making needed adjustments, the path becomes longer or veers off into an entirely different destination. It may appear we made a serious mistake, but it may be more a matter of tracing our steps and finding out where we went wrong. The PDCA process should be part of our road map with mile markers clearly identified as points of analysis.

Misunderstandings: Just the use of the word indicates we're probably talking about a communication problem -- either with ourselves or others. Most likely it is probably both. Our intentions, no matter how pure, can and will be misconstrued. We'll choose the wrong words, say the wrong thing, and even create confusion. Our emotions can get in the way and create a little bit of havoc in our relationships. People of great passion probably run this risk as well as people of great pride. We may have a great vision, but it means nothing if we can't clearly articulate it. We may be absolutely certain we are right, but what good will it do us if no one is there to see it come to fruition.

As a DISC certified behavioral consultant, I am the first to realize that people are different with different temperaments, learning preferences, and behavioral styles. As an imperfect human, I also forget and sometimes plow through as if everyone thinks and acts exactly like me. Painful, but true. Newsflash: We don't always know what's good for everyone, so let's stop dispensing our own brand of medicine.

Asking for clarification and forgiveness when necessary -- and it is probably more necessary than we think -- takes courage, humility and a loving heart. If we really care, we'll make our relationships and our communication a priority. If someone is asking your forgiveness and your restoration, I hope you'll have the same courage, humility, and love to accept and restore.

Today, I hope we can recognize the imperfect nature of ourselves and the imperfect nature of others. Let us be quick to change, quick to apologize, quick to forgive, quick to accept forgiveness, and quick to move to the door, open it, and ask the elephant to leave -- and never return. 

More personally, if I have failed you in any way, please forgive me and let us open the door to a new day, a new destination, and a new relationship.

The Benefits of Fun-Raising

"Today is good. Today is fun Tomorrow is another one." -- Dr. Seuss

I recently saw a meme that said something to the effect of: "After careful consideration, I decided this being an adult thing is not working out for me." Of course the humor in it is that most of us can relate. Sometimes that desire just to be a kid again finds its way into our mind before we quickly dismiss it and move on to our next deadline, demand, or decision. I think the lure of our childhood is rooted in the seemingly endless hours we had to just -- play. In fact we were encouraged and often commanded to "go outside and play". In retrospect, it seems those demands became more frequent and more exasperated as the summer continued to roll on. Many a back-to-school ad brought relief and maybe even a wry smile to a worn-out parent.  Perhaps you've smiled that smile yourself.

This all came to mind when I realized that over the next month or two, school years will wind down and one thing will be on the minds of kids everywhere. Summer vacation. With a bit of envy, I thought about all those wonderful opportunities for fun and games -- if you happen to be a kid. Since I have long passed that particular threshold in my life, I immediately moved into adult mode and politely advised myself to put on my big boy pants and deal with it.

Then, I got to thinking. Why should play and fun be the exclusive domain of the juvenile set? As parents we've researched the benefits of play and as a result encourage our children and grandchildren to do as much as they can. So, why are we not extending these same benefits to ourselves and doing more to increase our own opportunities for fun and games? Childish? Hardly. According to HealthGuide.org, there is a good reason we, as adults, should spend more time playing. This site suggests: "Play can add joy to life, relieve stress, supercharge learning, and connect you to others and the world around you. Play can also make work more productive and pleasurable."

Here are a few of the benefits play can provide taken directly from the HealthQuest.org site:

·         Relieve stress. Play is fun and can trigger the release of endorphins, the body’s natural feel-good chemicals. Endorphins promote an overall sense of well-being and can even temporarily relieve pain.

·         Improve brain function. Playing chess, completing puzzles, or pursuing other fun activities that challenge the brain can help prevent memory problems and improve brain function. The social interaction of playing with family and friends can also help ward off stress and depression.

·         Stimulate the mind and boost creativity. Young children often learn best when they are playing—and that principle applies to adults, as well. You’ll learn a new task better when it’s fun and you’re in a relaxed and playful mood. Play can also stimulate your imagination, helping you adapt and problem solve. -- Find more at HealthGuide.org 

So let's find time to put the electronic gadgets away and become the "fun-raisers" in our circle of influence. With the warmer weather making its way and bringing longer days with it, let's make play a priority and a habit. If we do it right, we may find ourselves a whole lot more fun to be around.